mathematically eliminated

This school year is the year that “Super-Dad’s” cap may get a bit tattered. My image as a the knower and thinker of all there is to know and think may be tarnished a bit.

Because this year my baby has pre-algebra.

I am good with words and ideas and silliness and things in this general area.

Math not so much.

And as Macie heads into pre-algebra I just feel it is important to share a few thoughst I shared with her about algebra and other forms of (ahem..some would say) “higher math:”

  1. Math is supposed to be done with numbers. All this “A squared” and “B times Y” is not math, it is gibberish.
  2. I think that this alleged “math” with all the letters and such is a big part of the downfall of American society. We have all these kids in other country’s working hard at math, what with the going to school six days a week and all through the summer, THESE KIDS ARE DOING MATH WITH NUMBERS. I am sure of it. And as long as we as a nation continue to try and use letters where numbers are supposed to be used, we are going to continue our rapid descent.
  3. Proofs – all through geometry, I an inundated with the expectation that I will “prove” a theorem. Let me make a couple of things clear here. 1) as I understand it, all these “theroems” were proven centuries ago by guys like Pythagoras and Euclide and a bunch of other Greek-ish guys. And they are all dead.
  4. And let’s be very clear about this…I am NOT smarter than those guys. They have stuff named after them, like theorems and types of “allegedly higher mathematics” and possible some cars or bridges or small towns in countries I have never heard of. I have none of those things.
  5. Since we are talking about math, let me give you an equation that explains all of this. Lets assume that “The smartness of Euclid ” is “A; “The smartness of Pythagoras” “B”; and “The smartness of Jeff Atwood”  is “C.” Simply put….if A > C and  B > C, then…
  6. A + B  is most definitely> C
  7. So therefore, it is simply illogoical for anyone to expect that I will prove and/or disprove anything better than our toga wearing buddies like Pythagoras and Euclide.
  8. So the best advice I can give you Macie when it comes to math is…
  9. Go ask your Mother.
  10. Because again if we turn it into an equation and Mommy is “A” and Daddy is “B”…
  11. A>B.
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Posted on August 15, 2011, in Dad stuff, Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. I’m right there with you, Jeff. I think Microsoft invented math so we would have a reason to use Excel.

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