Halloween

Img640Dear Parents of America:

This is not meant to sound like one of those "back when I was a kid speeches."

But back when I was a kid, there were significant limitations on the kids of costumes you could wear for Halloween. As I recall, there were essentially three options.

You could be a hobo – which meant you wore your Dad’s old clothes and got to mark your face with a piece of charcoal for added "hobo-ness." You could be a pirate which meant that you wore a puffy shirt and an eye-patch. Or you could be a ghost, which meant you could wear an old sheet.

There were a handful of outliers like baseball player or vampire or maybe for a girl you could be a ballerina or, if you had a stick and a big black hat, you could be a witch.

But basically, there were three main costumes.

But now…

Well, actually now there are some limitations with costumes too.

But not in the number available.

The limitation today is that every costume starts with the word "slut."

As in "slut hobo." Or "slut pirate." And though I have not seen it, there is no doubt a "slut ghost" costume somewhere.

Why?

It used to be that the equation for Halloween was Halloween = Candy. Now it is Halloween = Slut.

Seems the motto for the day is the line from Mean Girls:

"Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."

C’mon parents…put on your big boy pants and say "no…that is not appropriate. Is it so hard to say to your daughter, ‘I would prefer you not dress like a slut.’"

That’s all I’m asking.

(man…this does sound like one of those "back in my day speeches."

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Posted on October 29, 2008, in Dad stuff. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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