Anyone bring the camera

I drove by the kiddy soccer field this weekend and saw the groups of parents (i.e. pack mules) carrying the camera, video camera, phone camera, back up batteries, etc, off to the field.

So in light of the fact that I no longre have to do any of that as we have "graduated" from kiddy soccer, I offer up some infromation I have previously shared. This is primarily a public service offering to those with little one’s just getting started in the racket called soccer…

After considerable consideration and consternation, I have come up with "Atwood’s First (and probably last) Postulate on the Prevalence of Picture Taking at Events Where Most Loving Parents Are Taking Zillions of Shots and The Best I Can Do is a Lame Phone Camera Shot."

Here is the equation:

Z= (A/ S) – (F/Y x P/V) + N/B

Here is the key to the variables:

X – the sum total number of minutes and/or pictures

A – age of children

S – # of games in season

F – # of kids with significant food allergies or religious food requirements on team

Y – #of times required to be "snack mom or dad"

P – # of pictures taken in previous seasons that have never made it off the little disc thing in the camera

V – # of minutes of video shot over previous seasons that has never been seen – including the game winning goal in the final game of the season in "little [INSERT NAME OF CHILD HERE] first season, but it’s not really ‘game-winning goal’ because we don’t keep score in this league do we…?"

N – number of children in family

B – birth order of child in question

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Posted on September 22, 2008, in Dad stuff. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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